What have the Mobile Carriers ever done for us?

Here's a little ditty I composed after reading another "oh, what have the carriers done for us" post, with apologies to Monty Python's Flying Circus.

Reg: They've bled us white, the bastards. They've taken everything we had, and not just from us, from our fathers, and from our fathers' fathers.

Stan: And from our fathers' fathers' fathers.

Reg: Yeah.

Stan: And from our fathers' fathers' fathers' fathers.

Reg: Yeah. All right, Stan. Don't labour the point. And what have they ever given us in return?!

Xerxes: Text Messaging?

Reg: What?

Xerxes: Text Messaging, you know SMS.

Reg: Oh. Yeah, yeah. They did give us that. Uh, that's true. Yeah.

Commando 3: And premium billing.

Stan: Oh, yeah, premium billing, Reg. Remember what digital content sales on the internet used to be like?

Reg: Yeah. All right. I'll grant you the SMS and the Premium Billing are two things that the Mobile Operators have done.

Matthias: And the games!

Reg: Well, yeah. Obviously the games. I mean, the games go without saying, don't they? But apart from the SMS, the premium billing, and the games--

Commando: Ringtones.

Xerxes: Wallpapers.

Commandos: Huh? Heh? Huh...

Commando 2: WAP.

Commandos: Ohh...

Reg: Yeah, yeah. All right. Fair enough.

Commando 1: And the video.

Commandos: Oh, yes. Yeah...

Francis: Yeah. Yeah, that's something we'd really miss, Reg, if the Mobile Operators left. Huh.

Commando: Content Portals.

Stan: And you can sell 15 seconds of music for $2.99, Reg.

Francis: Yeah, they certainly know how to create a content market. Let's face it. They're the only ones who could on the internet!

Commandos: Hehh, heh. Heh heh heh heh heh heh heh.

Reg: But apart from the SMS, the Billing, Games, Wallpapers, WAP, Video, Content Portals, a $billion content market, and billions of subscribers, what have the Mobile Operators ever done for us?

Xerxes: Created the mobile industry?

Reg: Oh, ind-- Shut up!